“Hipster bullshit” - a non-exhaustive, completely unbiased and objective list
Today I told my friend +Jon Nielsen that the new Gary Numan album would be something worth checking out. He said he would, provided it wasn’t “hipster bullshit.” Which got me thinking that we need some sort of non-exhaustive reference list as to what “hipster bullshit” is, so potential disagreements in the future can at least be narrowly avoided.
So here is my non-exhaustive, completely non-biased and objective list (I have my unchallenged journalistic integrity to consider, after all) of things that qualify as “hipster bullshit”:
- Every single one of those identical-sounding shitty garage bands (The Strokes, The Killers, The Arctic Monkeys, The Hives…)
- Everyone who has ever worn a scarf or a pair of sunglasses indoors. Bonus doofus-points for refusing to remove said accessory when challenged.
- Every artist who has ever claimed “being an artist” was a job description. (Yes, this means Marilyn Manson is now technically hipster bullshit.)
- Every artist who has ever sampled an 8-bit computer or console “ironically.”
- Every artist who has ever described their work as being ironic without being the Pet Shop Boys.
- Everything the Red Hot Chili Peppers have done since they stopped doing drugs.
- Every artist who has ever used vintage recording equipment for visual aesthetics rather than its sonic properties.
- Anyone wearing Buffalo shoes who was born after 1995.
- Anyone sporting a mustache who was born after 1995.
- Every single shoegazer band ever.
- Insert indie film joke. Seriously. You know it’s true.
Feel free to add more yourselves.
